Captain’s Log: March 25, 2020
Wednesday.
I’m not going to sugarcoat this. I may be at my breaking point. It’s only been three days at home with both kids but I may have seriously reached my breaking point.
My “mental health” walk with the dog was foiled by my 4 year-old.
I spent the first ten minutes arguing with her about which vehicle she would ride to the tire swing knowing it would end with me carrying it back while trying to walk a dog. Finally got her to agree to the scooter. This lasted three houses. Then we turned back to get her bike. The bike I didn’t want to bring because it’s heavy.
Walked to tire swing. Walked is a simplified account of what happened. It was more walked to tire swing, and also tried to keep dog leash from clothes-lining my daughter while also pushing her and the bike over the sidewalk bumps because apparently if you encounter a bump in the sidewalk you need to stop pedaling, yell “bump!” and await a gentle giddy-up parent push….THAT is more accurate.
Quarter of a mile. 15 minutes to get there.
After wiping down the tire and the chains, we spent ten minutes at the tire swing. Ten minutes of the kids sort of swinging. But also fighting about the swing going too fast, too slow, too spinny, too “swingy.” The tire swing was too swingy…I can’t. Time to head back.
Princess’s legs are tired. Too tired to pedal.
First attempt to keep her on the bike:
- “The faster you pedal the sooner you will be home.”
And when that failed…
2. “If you get off that bike, I’m leaving it here.”
Also a fail.
If I leave it there, I still have to walk back and get it. That’s a no.
Finally home. At least the walk back was faster since she was walking. I was remarkably fast despite walking a dog one one side and carrying a Minnie Mouse bike on the shoulder of the other. She helped by carrying her helmet.
45 minutes. Walked less than half a mile. Burned a max 30 calories-most of which from yelling about the scooter and the bike on the driveway.
It was 9:27 AM CST and it was already the longest day ever.
Good thing I had the distraction of the real job I am supposed to be doing.
In between getting my son logged into his classes and Google Hangouts, checking his work, Pre-K educational activities, the 1000+ questions to answer for my daughter, and feeding and care of the dog, I also have my actual work to do. Luckily I can work from home. But work is similar to walk in that it is not a simple four letter word.
So so many four-letter words….
This was all day. The kids fought about chalk. They fought about stickers. They fought about bees. They fought about whether or not they were fighting.
And the crying…so much crying. So many tantrums. And not JUST from me.
It was just not a good day for any of us.
Finally at 2:00 in the afternoon and at my breaking point, I realized what needed to happen. I needed to add water.
Some of the best parenting advice I ever read was “when it gets hard, add water.” A bath. Playing in the rain. Or a good swim.
SWIM (Another four-letter word by the way). Short for “Fine. Quit asking me if you can get in the pool. I have to get on a conference call. Get your suits. Get your floaties. And get out of my face.”
I didn’t care that the pool was super cold.
I didn’t care that they wasted our now very valuable latex gloves to fill with pool water to water the dog, and my leg, and that table over there.
I didn’t care. They didn’t care. We added water.
We added water until Parent 2 returned from essential work and a Hunger Games-like visit to Walmart for wine, cereal and cheese. And after that, I relinquished my duty of parent in charge. They were all his until 7 AM today. And you know what. It did help. What was a little crazy (me?) was calm again.
Here’s what I know from day 3. I am not designed for stay at home parenting. There is not enough wine or water in the world for me to do this everyday.
I bow before those gentle patient givers of care who deliver sunshine and fancy crafts to little people. I don’t know how you do it.
Teachers, SAHMs, SAHDs, nurses, day care workers, lunch ladies, school admins. ANY of you who have to interact with these heathon…I mean adorable children— I commend you.
If this whole global pandemic has shown me anything, it is that we can’t do it without you. I CAN’T do it without you.
And also wine. I can’t do this without wine.
So hang in there mom and dads. Spring is coming. Temps are rising. And the ability to add water is increasing.
At the very least, run a bath-for them AND for you! Any parent who made it through a Day 3 has earned at least that.